Waiting is…

Sunday - 28 September 2003

‘Waiting Is…’ a coined phrase by an old friend. He taught me a lot about patience, although I still have a lot to learn.

Waiting for the fires to finally burn themselves out. The smoke fills the sky and it is hard to breathe today, as it was on Thursday. We (here in Garberville) did have less smoke on Friday and Saturday, but that just means some one else had it… it all depends on the wind flow.

Waiting for the phone to ring. Still waiting for the appointment for the chest clinic for Russel, who is hurting lots more and coughing more too. I am most concerned about the ‘pain’. It doesn’t hurt for him to do deep breathing (as in yoga breaths), but the pain pressure is always there and at times much stronger. He has been using Vicodin and that is not good as he is not one to use painkillers willy-nilly.

Stress is hurting me. And not being able to walk, (it’s too smokey to even go outside unless you have too), isn’t helping my body much. Waking up with more aches and pains than I went to bed with.

Our mortality is showing. It becomes apparent that one should embrace each day and each interaction with a friend or acquaintance as if it were the last time you may see them. It is sometimes hard to do, in our busy lives. But it is the most fulfilling way to be.

Russel was commenting on this yesterday as we ran into someone we don’t see often. He is feeling his mortality for sure, and that in a way, scares me because it shows me that he is too really worried and that it’s not just me being a worry-wart.

So, as TR used to tell me, ‘Waiting Is..’

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